Freedom
by Mixceny
Summary: Request fic for erkenemerkel. M for suicide. WARNING: May trigger, read at own risk. Ciel Phantomhive and Sebastian Michaelis are the most well-known couple on T.V, but when the stress get's to him, he takes it out on the very same vulnerable boy that he had said he would love and cherish as a lover, and a master...
1. Ciel's Freedom

The once infamous Ciel Phantomhive of the now popular T.V show Kuroshitsuji was in a condition that most people would find unheard of. He was hurt, mentally destroyed, and felt honestly completely useless to the world. He was hiding out in him and his "lover," Sebastian's, shared condo. More specifically, he had locked himself in the bright bedroom. The room was simple and modern, light wooden floors and pastel blue walls reflecting the sunlight from the closed sliding doors that lead out to the small balcony, and clear white curtains covering those for decoration. The walk in closet was near that, massive and full of costumes. Across from the massive room, was the four-post bed they had kept from the Black Butler 1 shoot. It was Ciel's favorite after all, so they had decided to keep it to add a gothic touch to the otherwise bright room.

The boy took a seat on the bed, heart still pounding in fear that the other man inside would find his location. His heard turned to the small, black, bedside table. There was a lamp and a few books on it for light reading, but on the corner of the stand was a photo. The frame itself was pure gold with blood diamonds, and the photo inside was one that brought back the good memories he had. It was before they had gone into Season 3, which seemed to...Change the man. In the photo were all of his friends from Black Butler 2. Hannah, the servants, Agni and Sohma, the shinigamis, Alois, even Claude had joined in for the picture! The boy couldn't help but smile at he held the small photograph in his small, frail hands. He and Sebastian were holding hands, and he himself was flailing his free hand as Sebastian attempted to kiss him. It was honestly extremely adorable, and he wished times would go back to then.

They never will though...The once loved man has become God's definition of a demon. The stresses of life, trying to pay off all the bills and college loans they owed, it had all turned the man sour. The worst of it all though, was the show that had brought them together. The new director had put some real pressure on the demon, who was still recovering from his leg injury from the accident in Season 2. He was making him do all kinds of things he wasn't physically ready for, but if he were fired everyone knew that the show would die.

And so, he took out his anger on Ciel. If the bluenette even used the wrong foot in a dance, he feared for his life. Behind closed doors, that beautifully faked smirk turns into a frown, a snarl, and a mouth full of hate. Speaking of the demon, Ciel jumped as he snapped out of his thoughts, hearing the lock being violently picked on the other end. Desperate, he ran and grabbed the door knob and began to turn it the opposite direction of how the older male world turn it. He whimpered, tears filling his eyes before he'd even seen the man's eyes, "Please stop...Please don't hurt me! I'm sorry!"

The growl from the other side of the door was loud enough that he wasn't shocked anyone had complained. Then again, nobody lived on their floor, or anywhere near it. So there was nothing to protect him, "Why? I **told** you **not** to step on my foot, or there would be consequences. That's exactly what you did you good for nothing..." He stopped as the door flew open, sending Ciel flying to thankfully land on the bed. Sebastian slammed the door behind him, making his way up to the trembling boy who was currently frozen in fear, "You good for nothing little fucker. You'll be lucky if you can see the light of day when I'm done." He sneered the words, making the boy flinch. He felt himself being lifted by his neck, , and tossed hard against the headboard of the bed. Sebastian climbed on top, grinning darkly, "I'll show you what you're good for Ciel...Then maybe you'll do what I say."

The boy's head was growing foggy from the trauma it just endured. It hurt, worse than anything the man had did before. He could feel his clothes being ripped off, but he was too weak to fight it. He wouldn't be awake to remember anything, anyways...He was right. As soon the pain of being roughly slammed inside of played through his nerves, he lost consciousness.

* * *

><p>Ciel's eyes slowly fluttered open, feeling numb. How far did the demon go this time...? He groaned softly as he sat up, instantly regretting it from the sharp pain in his bottom and the churning of his upset stomach. Slowly, the bluenette turned his head to the side and noticed a small note neatly lying on top of the old photo he had in his hands previously. He reached for it, barely able to grasp it and pulling it close enough for the boy to read.<p>

"Ciel, I've decided to go drink again. Grelle agreed to join me, so if I don't return home you know damn well what I'm doing. Don't call the cops or that slut friend of yours Trancy, or else, there'll be Hell to pay tomorrow."

The boy stared in shock at the letter, tears welling up in his eyes as he threw it into the trash bin by the bed. Carefully, he managed to prop himself into a sitting position. He could feel a constant pain radiating up his spine, as well as a forming headache that he couldn't even describe as he did. What did he do to deserve such treatment?

He thought about what he could do now. He could act as if it never happened like he'd learned to do, since trying to defend himself after only made things worse. The cops are on Sebastian's side since his father works for them, so they won't do anything. Alois...Alois is too much a gossip to keep his mouth shut about anything. They are best friends, so maybe he could at least call him and try to calm himself. He smiled a little, grabbing his phone outside of his bedside drawer and scrolling through the contacts. When he found Trancy's number, he pushed dial and held it up to his ear. Still, ideas continued to run through his mind of what to do now.

*beep*

Well...The only option he had left was...Death. He could finally get out of dealing with Sebastian. Yes, Alois would miss him, as would the others. But even the raven-haired male had said himself; it wouldn't be hard to replace him...Right?

*beep*

But his family? They all actually live...They'd miss him dearly. At the same time, they'd understand. His mother going through two divorces and an abusive husband herself, she's be able to explain it to father...There's good intentions behind this...

*beep*

Ciel slowly stood as he convinced himself it was the best way, slowly and painfully standing off the satin sheets. He steadied himself, and then slowly walked towards the balcony. The phone seemed attached to him, never leaving his hand as he did. The blonde picked up as the boy made it outside, thankfully Sebastian had at least had the courtesy of dressing him, so he wasn't freezing cold.

"Ciel?! Ciel are you okay?" Alois's high-pitched voice said into the speaker, ringing into the younger boy's ears. The frantic voice only seemed to make Ciel smile more, "Ciel?! Answer me! What's going on; what happened?!" The worry in the teen's voice was evident, and it seemed to be fueling the suicidal boy, "Hey..." He mumbled into the phone, voice cracking and slightly weak. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he put one foot over the metal fence that protected him from the 30 story drop below, "Alois, I need to tell you something..."

The blonde went silent for a moment, then seemed to be talking much quieter than before, "What is it?" Ciel thought as he swung his other leg over, now balancing himself over the large busy streets below him, "Make sure at my funeral, you find Sebastian and tell him this..." He sighed, looking up at the starry night sky above him, "Once something is truly gone, you can never get it back...No matter how hard you try." Whatever Alois had said on the other line was never heard by anyone but himself, because Ciel pushed himself off at that moment and closed his eyes, smiling. He let his life, the best memories he has flash through his eyes seconds before the excruciating pain hit him, letting him pass in the saddest, but yet happiest moment in his life. The moment he was worry free, and everything that was bad was finally let go of.


	2. Sebastian's Freedom

Sebastian grunted as he turned on his side, hearing the annoyingly familiar ring of a rock band screaming in his ear. Red orbs adjusted to the light as he fluttered them open, instantly recognizing the blood-splattered red and black walls and bright matching curtains. He let out a sigh and picked up his phone, an Android that was signaling an incoming text. He put in the pin for the lock screen, which was a picture of Ciel in his outfit. He viewed the text, black letters telling him all he needed to know from Alois.

"Sebastian, you fucking bastard..."

A soft chuckle escaped his lips. Ah, Ciel disobeyed him once again. Hopefully he'll forgive him for what he would do later, same as the previous night. He sat up slowly, raven hair a mess and chest covered in dried semen. Turning his head to the left, he saw a disturbing sight of who he'd slept with. He'd thought he might've stayed in his guest apartment, but no...He'd fucked around with that annoying redhead...

Speaking of, the man beside him chuckled, "My my, a little early today for rising are we?" The green-eyed transgender turned to face him, "You gave me quite the ride last night...Oh please tell me you'll o it again soon..." He sat up, whispering in his ear, "Bassy~" The actor shivered, quickly sliding out of the bed and grabbing his jeans off the brown hardwood. Sliding them on, he wiped the cum off and wiped it on the red sheets that the other male used, "Don't expect it soon." With that, he quickly made his way outside the male's house as he dialed Alois's number.

It didn't even finish dialing before the blonde had answered, "Prick! Why the fuck are you calling me?!" The loud scream made him pull the phone away from his ear, grumbling slightly in annoyance. Yes, he'd hurt the boy again, but wasn't he used to it by now? It's not like he'd killed him! "I want to know what Ciel had said to you..." He growled after the teen had stopped ranting. He'd also remembered reading a text on the way out, "And also...Why is Season 3 cancelled as of now? We're almost halfway through..."

"Oh, you have no idea..." The angered voice became almost demented, "You don't realize what you've caused..." The man finally walked up to his apartment complex, frowning at the police cars, "Where are there cops at the apartments?" He was starting to feel worried. Did someone go after Ciel? Were they simply robbed? He was starting to get confused, and extremely annoyed at the lack of answers he was getting, "Alois, tell me what's going on or you'll be begging for mercy..."

An annoying laugh rang through his left ear, "I'd suggest you get away from there, unless you want to end up in prison right now." With that, he heard the chime of the call ending. He was pissed now, that brat was going to get it...He turned, running back down the street he came to get to Alois's house. It wasn't too far, about a half an hour on foot. His thoughts were plenty to keep him occupied until he got there though, the many different things that could've happened.

Despite everything, he still loved Ciel. He didn't want to go and find out he had been hurt, that thought alone frightened him. He loved the boy, as a butler and as a lover. They were a pair, a match made in the depths of Hell. Heh...Ciel would slap him for thinking that. Sebastian was a Satanic, while his boyfriend was Christian. That was the only minor setback about them, but otherwise they were perfect. At least, in his mind they were.

The time ticked by as he walked. Well, more like ran to the blonde's house. His heart was racing, anxiety and adrenaline fueling him to keep going despite everything in his body aching from running for twenty minutes. He pulled out his phone, feeling it vibrate and hearing the tone once again. This time it was from Ciel's phone. At first, he felt a sense of relief wash over him. The boy was alright...That was, until he opened the message.

"Hey, I got Ciel's phone by the way. Don't expect to be returning it to him anytime soon."

His eyes seemed to glow, despite him being a human, in pure anger. Why wouldn't Ciel want his phone back?! He walked up to the door, not bothering to knock, slamming it open with such force that it made the entire small, brick home shake. Confused golden orbs met his own, and for a moment he seemed to calm down. Despite the rivalry that had in the show, they were quite good friends in person. He and Claude were the ones who originally had the idea for Black Butler in the first place, despite how small of a part the other demon played.

"Is there something you needed, Michaelis?" He frowned a little, pushing the frames of his glasses back in place as they attempted to slide down. "Yes..." The male panted, fearing that he'd take out his anger on Claude if he stood there much longer, "Where the fuck is your bitch of a fiancée..." The man flinched at the harsh words coming from his friend, but he still nodded down a small hallway, "His room..." With a small nod, the raven hared male walked down the quiet brick hallway. The house was nicely made, despite who owned it. The entire thing was in red brick, except the roofing. It only had one bedroom, but it was a perfect fit for the spider and his prey.

Alois opened the door before Sebastian's hand could reach around that golden handle that separated the two. He seemed to have that sad smile that he had when the two had found Alois as an orphan with the desire to act. It worried the older man slightly, but he brushed that aside, anger taking over him once more. Slender fingers wrapped themselves around the fragile boy's neck, soon they being the only thing holding the boy off the ground, "Where is my boyfriend you tramp?" He growled lowly, slamming him roughly against the wall by his throat.

He struggled for the air to respond, shaking, "D-don't kill me w-with your own h-hands to, m-moron..." He groaned, straining his head in hope it'll let him breathe more. The words made Sebastian let go, the teen instantly sinking to the ground in a trembling heap. Tears were pouring down the younger's face as he spoke just loud enough for the raven-haired actor's ears, "Ciel...H-he died last night...Killed himself b-because he couldn't h-handle you anymore..." The man froze, not even breathing from shock. Ciel's...Dead? He's gone, and because of him...

The blonde slowly stood, using the wall for means of support. His eyes were unfocused as he tried to stand, succeeding after a few tries, "You c-can stay here...Until th-the cops l-l-leave..." With that said, he stumbled out of the room to leave the other, who was now sitting on the golden king-sized bed. He was starting to take in the room to distract himself, looking from the silver carpet to the green walls. The room had one small window that was covered with a curtain. The two that lived here liked the dark, so it made sense for them to block out the only light source.

The demon couldn't seem to get the lump out of his chest as he sat there, not even realizing the tears that slowly streamed down his face. He had killed Ciel...He had really killed Ciel Phantomhive. One of the strongest, yet the most innocent people he'd ever known...The man sighed, whispering more to himself than anyone else, "Well...I suppose everyone has a breaking point...Yes? I must've hit his..." He stood, groaning at the feeling. His body was running on adrenaline, and now that all he felt was pain, all the physical damage he'd dealt was slowly showing its ugly face. His bare feet ached from the minor burns he had from running on the hard pavement, a few rock embedded inside. His entire body ached from the previous night's events, and his head hurt from a minor hangover that he'd managed to get from drinking. The raven sensed someone was watching him, making him turn around. He was expecting Alois to lecture him more, but instead he got the other demon.

* * *

><p>The same man who was in so much pain was dressed in suit and tie, much like the few people around him. Most were crying, or trying their hardest not to, which was seemingly impossible. The almighty demon himself was letting a few tears go. He was listening to people give idle speeches and annoying words about the now deceased boy, it was bugging him. How many people had honestly missed him as Ciel, and not the person they seen on the T.V? Many fans were there, and they seemed more affected then the ones closer to him, like Alois and himself. Well, there was a difference, they had already let the tears go and gave their pain up to whatever being watches them in their wake.<p>

The chapel they were in was bathed in white. White walls, white wooden floors, white benches, even the crosses that decorated the place were white with golden accents. It disgusted the demon to have to tolerate it, but he would for his lover. The closed casket was pure black upon his own request, remembering exactly what the boy had said to him. He had the single black rose, and made sure the boy was all dressed in white. He won't say the words that were asked, he'd lose him composure.

Alois was sitting on one side of him, Claude on the other. The blonde had remembered what Ciel had said, so he stood when he was given the chance and made his way gracefully to the podium. Icy blue eyes men the demon's as he spoke, "I was the last person Ciel spoke to before he jumped..." The crowed went to a bit of a murmur as he spoke, "And he had told me to say this...Specifically to Sebastian. Once something is truly gone, you can never get it back...No matter how hard you try..." The blonde seemed to break down saying that, Claude walking to his aid and guiding him back to his spot on the hard benches.

It was his turn to stand, and rather than going to speak to the audience as everyone else had, he walked to the casket. Lifting the top and revealing the boy, who looked more at peace in his death then he had in life, he sat the rose between his intertwined fivers on his chest. With a gentle, sad smile, he leaned in and kissed the head of which he once lived for. Despite everything, he was going to miss him. He could never serve another master; after all, he was Ciel's, and only the boy's.

A few whispered were heard as he walked out of the church without a word. Sebastian didn't care though, he was fighting his emotions. He wanted to cry, scream in pain and anger at himself. It was his fault the boy was dead, and nobody else's. He settled himself in his car, looking at the passenger seat and jumping. He didn't expect his mind to begin to play tricks on him, for a moment it seemed as if Ciel was sitting there. No...Ciel's gone. You'll never see those blue eyes again...He shook his head, gripping the wheel as he drove towards home at first. Then he thought about a place he'd much rather visit. The Cliffside that they had first became a couple. He changed course, driving down into the country rather than the city.

By time he had gotten there, he was weak. His stomach was growling, it was late at night. It was morning when he'd went to the funeral, and now it was nearing midnight. The only times he'd stopped were for the restroom, otherwise he'd kept on driving. It was a dumb thing to do, but what harm is one day going to do? He's already underweight due to the eating disorder he'd developed because of that damned director that started everything...

No, he shouldn't blame that man for his problems. It was his fault he raped Ciel. It was he who smacked the boy around and beat him down. He was the one who yelled at him, calling him worthless and treating him like the lowly dog. He stopped the car and got out, walking to the clearing in the woods that showed a beautiful Cliffside view of the night sky. A bottle of beer in his hand, he sat down at the edge and stared out at the vast ocean. He took a drink, sighing. This was where everything began. They had found love right here. They had made love here for the first time; it was a seemingly unforgettable moment.

The two were inseparable then, completely in sync with each other. It was true love then, and there was no pain and suffering on either end. He smiled a bit as the memories went through his mind, taking another drink and letting the pain get doused with the alcohol in his system. Red eyes shut as he let out a sigh, ah how he missed the boy already, and he wasn't sure how much longer he would live...

Sebastian didn't live much longer either. Three years later he died of alcohol poisoning in a downtown club. They were buried next to each other, and never missed or spoken of again, as by then, nobody knew who either of them were other then another couple in the cemetery.

* * *

><p>So, I finally finished it. Rushed the end, yes, but oh well, it's done and I had a lot of fun with this. Hope you all had a happy Halloween!<p>

_~Mixceny_


End file.
